The worst thing about not being single

It isn't that I miss sleeping with a hundred men, or running my hands over someone else's breasts (although it is a lovely feeling), nor is it the "independence" of being a free spirit. The worst thing about not being single is the unfillable late hours spend tossing and turning in an ocean of bed, knowing it should have warmth. There should be a bolster that snores and farts, scratches and pokes and takes up all the sheets in their arms. Something to snuggle against, and the reason you will only ever sleep on your half of the bed. You wake up cuddling a pile of pillows that doesn't even smell the same. I get nightmares. I hate waking up and crying. It's pathetic. But, I still need a hug afterwards. Yeah, I can go weeks apart in the daytime, despite having nothing to do. But not nights. Never nights.

I sat down and drank a cup of hot chocolate today, to get rid of my hangover. It was silky and delicious, perfecting my moment of being alone. I didn't care about the calories :) It was just nice to be by myself, peaceful and content as it washed away the nausea.