Whut

I just woke up from a dream, a little unusual and perhaps a little telling. I was staying in a mansion with two other beautiful women. We would sit by the pool, drink cocktails and go through an extensive wardrobe. I woke up feeling quite content, and promptly fell back to sleep. Then one day some guys came over and started filming and I realised we were all porn stars. When I refused to do double anal, they made me give a rimjob to the guy that was fucking the blonde pornstar doggy-style. Why do my dreams always take a turn for the worst?

Everything seems so hopeless at night, lying in bed in the dark with nothing but myself. I cry like a bitch. The last threads of colour merge with the grey and are lost to the drain. So, I was thinking maybe we could start fresh from the beginning, only less of a mess?

Hi, I'm Khloe.

I don't like chocolate. No one has ever taken me to dinner. I don't dance in the rain but I love being in it. When I find a song I like, I repeat it for days. And days. At the moment it's a toss up between Girlscout and A Praise Chorus. It's been ages since I put any effort into how I looked. I can't stand most extroverts. All my friends are more like drinking buddies. I'm vulgar, I spit swear and puke, wake up naked in unknown places, I drink whiskey, I'm narcissistic, I like riding those dodgy moving cow games, with whiskey in one hand. I bite, I hiss, I fight. I prefer showers to baths. I like sharing them. AND I can't sing but I do it anyway. If I was a man, I would run a mile.

I'm preparing for a Star Wars marathon. :D